Saturday, September 4, 2010

Old friends

It's funny how people end up in your life and how your relationship with them changes over time. Way back in junior high, there were two people in my life, I'll call them Jack and Jill. Jill was actually someone, in my attempts to hang with the cool crowd, I wasn't very nice to in junior high. Jack and I had many classes together, but were not particularly close. Despite the fact that we did end up going out briefly in the junior high sense of going out where it doesn't really mean much.

Fast forward to high school. Jack and I don't interact much at all. Jill becomes one of my closest friends. (Begin long period of guilt for not treating her well before, but that's not what this story is about). As a close friend, Jill is one of the few people from high school I keep in touch with when we scatter for college. We would email and IM frequently, talk by phone every once in a while, get together when both back at home for holidays. Jill also stayed in contact with Jack and through her, I kept up with Jack's life and even reconnected with him a few times. There were times when I did think it was odd that of all the people I went to school with, he was one of the few that I followed what happened to him as time went by. Not that I followed him in great detail, but I knew the general contours. He came out of the closet and had a long term partner, moved around to a few different cities, kept up with his jobs, etc.

And then we entered the fac.eb00k era and suddenly everyone I ever knew in junior high or high school wanted to reconnect. I admit I was not always excited to read the daily lives of all these old friends. It may be nice to catch up once or twice, but honestly people move to dofferent places in their lives and you don't always want to go there with them. I will also admit to defriending some old acquaintances aftwr a few weeks on FB. But Jack was one person who I do enjoy connnecting with. Both because he has an interesting life (although if you are reading this, I'm not such a fan of all the location updates-I don't need to know how often you visit the grocery store), and more importantly because Jill has kept this thread alive between us over the years.

Anyway, the point of this post. Jack and his partner have adopted two children. It was a real pleasure reading their story and seeing all the ups and downs of the adoption process, from the perspective of someone I know IRL. There were posts that made me laugh, posts that made me cry from happiness, and posts where my heart ached for them. Their adoption was finalized this week and it was heartwarming to see how their whole family came out for their court date.

I don't know if it is watching this process or some realizations I had during our trip to Ireland, but I think I am opening up to adoption now. We had talked about it in the past, but always in a "I don't really want to, but would prefer it over IVF" type of way. I think now I am seeing how it could be a real viable option for us if this cycle or the next one or two don't work out. Not that I am feeling pessimistic about this cycle. I don't optimism or pessimism is a good way to describe how I feel, it is more hopeful yet realistic. I am trying to delay committing to my family's D1sney vacation attached to my brother's wedding next May just in case this works, but also being realistic about our chances.

And an update about this cycle, my lining is tripled striped, endometrium is 8.5. That sounds like good news. Even better news is that a second follicle has shown up on the right at 15mm. The lead follie is at 18 now. Still nothing on the left. I trigger tomorrow night for IUI on Tuesday.


  1. I really hope that this cycle is the one for you and that you DO get to bail on the trip because of being big and happily pregnant!

  2. Missy, I think it's great that you are feeling more comfortable with the idea of adoption. My cousins have made the decision to adopt (after SEVEN failed rounds of IVF), and I think they are happier than they've been in years. Watching them come to peace with their decision, I definitely thought of you and wished you the best, where-ever this journey takes you.

    And with that being said, I have everything crossed for you for this cycle!!!


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