tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7190144653162636685.post7253048435470537972..comments2023-07-07T06:21:48.659-05:00Comments on My Scarlet baby: SiblingsMissyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10030801926318157162noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7190144653162636685.post-4925645667795283862010-07-04T00:35:25.344-05:002010-07-04T00:35:25.344-05:00I am the oldest of 4. My sister who is 14 months y...I am the oldest of 4. My sister who is 14 months younger than I has 3 of her own. My brother (6years younger) isn't married/no kids and my baby sister (12 years younger) is in Iraq in the Air Force-not even thinking about marriage or kids right now. My sis who has kids, often tells me "I don't why God let me be the one to be able to have kids and not you. I never wanted kids." She has no idea how much that stabs my heart everytime she says it. I really don't understand why God works that way either. She loves her kids, but a great mother she is not. Her oldest, my 19 year old niece, just announced that she is pregnant a few weeks ago. The baby is due right at Christmas this year. I never thought in a million years the little baby that I held in the hospital 19 years ago would ever get pregnant before me....<br />And thus is life. <br />I do have a 3.5 year old son via adoption who is my very heart and soul. But I fear that as long as I have breath, there is a part of me that will grieve the fact that I was never able to feel life growing inside my own womb.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7190144653162636685.post-56224843785197874992010-07-03T23:06:29.560-05:002010-07-03T23:06:29.560-05:00I hear you, Missy! My sister and I were very clos...I hear you, Missy! My sister and I were very close all through high school and college. But when she got married and had her kids right away, things really changed. I wasn't in any way ready to have kids yet, but I knew I wanted them someday. When we started having problems she was the one who made the comments about kids being so much work and not all they're cracked up to be. It's totally changed our relationship, and I don't know if it will ever get back to where it was.Mrs. Gamgeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18351339333625358960noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7190144653162636685.post-34233794789023029642010-07-03T22:26:08.183-05:002010-07-03T22:26:08.183-05:00Oh my goodness! I know so very much, how you feel!...Oh my goodness! I know so very much, how you feel! I am soo glad I stumbled across your blog. I have 2 older sisters, the oldest has been married for like 12 years and she has 2 children. One is about 8 and one is about 3. I was an older teen when she had her first but going through that process was when I knew I wanted to have children. I got married in 04, haven't been on birth control since, TTC, diagnosed with PCOS..etc, etc. My middle sister is only 3 years older than me and she has a 1 1/2 year old. She had her not long after my oldest sister had her second. It felt like a complete slap in the face though because she got pregnant by some guy she didn't even know from a party and wasnt ready for a baby and wasnt even sure she was going to keep it when she first found out. Anyhow, all this to say that there is a big wall between us, at least in my heart...Today there was a big family get together and she was there and brought my niece, who is beautiful and adorable in every kind of way...but its just hard. There were alot of new babys at this get together as it was for extended family...It's like I look forward to seeing everyone and then as soon as I get there and see all the babys I start to feel depressed, panicky(not sure if thats a word), and bad. I mean i just feel myself plummet inside and all i want to do is turn back to my truck and leave the way i came and come home and cry my eyes out. Anyhow, i've probably written too much...I'm new to blogging and am just amazed at how soo many other people share my feelings..thankyou for being open in your post sincerely, EvieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.com